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[personal profile] ifeelbetter
Hello, all. I have recently become aware of the fact that my lj practices are remarkably atypical and demand explanation.

I am really [livejournal.com profile] ifeelbetter in hiding from Real Life. Hence the name of this lj (It's a quote from Twelfth Night, for the peops in the hiz-ouse who rock the pretentiousness like I do, hollah). I have been writing fanfic since....I don't even know. The dawn of time. Whatevs.

I used to, as a pre-teen, write fic with my sister under the names "Molly Grue and Nobody Else." I also liked to use the name "Yorkshire Pudding." (Yes, that's the kind of kid I was, sorry parental units.) I took something like an eight-year break from writing--thinking I had "matured" past it or whatnot. Then grad school happened and I was reading fic again--first sign of a relapse--and then Inception happened and I was writing again too. So. Here we are now.

All of my academic real life is over at the "real" journal, the [livejournal.com profile] ifeelbetter one. The secrecy comes from the fact that that journal has been discovered by Real Life people on a couple of occasions (family--not even intimate family: extended bonkers family) and one of the things I really don't want my crazy bad-poet uncle bringing up at Thanksgiving dinner is my habit of writing silly gay stories. He makes crazy eyes at me already.

So. I am a cocktail of grad school, Victorian lit, emotive teaching, and obsessive fannish tendencies. I live in a world where Dylan Thomas and Edna St. Vincent Millay seem as real to me as a lot of the people I can reach out and touch so please excuse the pretentiousness. I don't ever mean it meanly. I honestly do frame my life practices around poetry and silly lit crit that loads of peoples could very rightly accuse of being navel-gazing. A lot of the fic I write shows this. That and the fact that I love drunkenness as a concept--being a rather shy and neurotic type myself, the loss of control inherent to drunkenness fascinates me. Other recurring themes are sleep (I'm an insomniac most of the year), technology (because the advances in communicative technology of the past decade seems beautiful to me), and, of course, the leap of faith that is falling in love.

This is where I live and I love the snow.

Date: 2011-02-15 07:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eternalsojourn.livejournal.com
Hey, would you mind terribly if I friended you? I love your writing and the types of themes you like to explore. I also loved your No Sex Rule fic I Won't Mind (If You Take Off All Your Clothes), which was hilarious.

I just thought I'd ask first.

Date: 2011-02-15 07:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com
Feel free to friend either one of me, willy-nilly. There's no such thing as too many friends, as far as I'm concerned. :)

Date: 2011-02-15 08:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] delires.livejournal.com
HI MATE. :DDD I feel like I haven't spoken to you in ages. I am such a rubbish commenter and so very flaky. BUT I HAVE MISSED YOU. How you doin'? ♥

I took something like an eight-year break from writing--thinking I had "matured" past it or whatnot. Then grad school happened and I was reading fic again--first sign of a relapse--and then Inception happened and I was writing again too. So. Here we are now.

This is pretty much my story, word for word. I was totally too 'mature' to write fic and then fell off the wagon so fucking hard. Now I've just given myself up to it totally.

Date: 2011-02-15 09:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com
HIHI. I'm out from under prelims and have a new lease on...sitting alone in my room writing fic. BUT. That's a HAPPY sentence in my head.

Just, like, two years ago I would have been shocked and appalled at myself for thinking that was a good reward for all my hard work in prelims. I don't know if it's that I know better now or...if I'm just a sad sack. Could go either way. ^_^;;

Date: 2011-02-15 09:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] delires.livejournal.com
I think that as you get a bit older...you just stop caring about what you 'should' do and just go with what makes you happy. *shrug*

I reckon that's probably a good thing.

Date: 2011-02-15 09:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com
Trufact. Plus. I totally think online fic-writing, fanart-ing communities have a spark of genius about them--not just because, seriously, who came up with the idea of narrating porn, right, but ALSO because it's such a beautiful impulse to see/read something and use your love of that to make more beautiful things and share them. Hot damn. Sometimes people are as good as I want them to be. :)

Date: 2011-02-16 06:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pyrimidine.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-02-17 01:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com
Thanks! :) I do my best...

Date: 2011-04-08 12:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] penimark.livejournal.com
Great post! I wish you could follow up on this topic!

(reply from suspended user)

Date: 2011-10-31 03:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hadrianidab.livejournal.com
Very enlightening and beneficial to someone whose been out of the circuit for a long time.

Date: 2011-11-01 04:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] durantdyly.livejournal.com
Please, can you PM me and tell me number of much more thinks about this, I am truly fan of one’s webpage…gets solved properly asap.


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