ifeelbetter: (Default)
ifeelbetter ([personal profile] ifeelbetter) wrote2010-08-06 12:02 am
Entry tags:

Say What You Mean (or, Mean What You Say)

Title: Say What You Mean (or, Mean What You Say)
Author: [livejournal.com profile] ifeelbetter
Warning: There be fluff in them there hills.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Word Count: 742
Summary: With all the pet-names flying around, is it really all that surprising that Arthur calls Eames 'darling' once by accident?
Notes: Written for this prompt in the second round of the [livejournal.com profile] inception_kink kink_meme. Short'n'sweet, 99% fluff.



ShitshitSHIT, thought Arthur. Then, when he saw that Eames had heard, that he'd frozen and that his expression--usually the equivalent of reading "See Spot Run" in terms of difficulty--had dropped, Arthur added: Fuck. Just for good measure.

"Come again?" Eames said. Why did he choose now to have fucking subtlety in his face? Why would this be the moment that Arthur couldn't be sure whether he was about to be teased for the rest of eternity or ... whatever the "or" was. Because the "or" was in Eames's eyes, even if the teasing was tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"No," said Arthur.

"I really didn't quite catch that, dear," said Eames. He held the folder up and pointed to it. "Were you asking me for the file?"

"You know damn well--" Arthur said through gritted teeth.

"Because you might have meant for Yusuf to hand you his file," Eames continued, pointedly blank.

"I'm pretty sure he meant you," said Yusuf.

"Yusuf doesn't even have a file, you ass," said Arthur.

"To avoid confusion, then," said Eames, drawing his words out. "One more time."

Arthur pinched the bridge of his nose. "Pass me that file," he repeated. Eames didn't move. Arthur sighed. "Darling."

"And that means me, does it?" Eames said, the smirk entirely overpowering his expression and gaining momentum. It still didn't touch his eyes, though. That goddamned "or" was still in his eyes.

"You're never going to give me that file, are you?"

"Language is delicate and unspecific, my pet," said Eames, chiding. "One must take caution in expressing oneself and in the interpretation of others."

"One must also hand over the goddamned file."

"All I ask for, in this life, is a little clarity." Eames pushed his chair back and sauntered towards Arthur, slow as molasses. "When you say, 'Pass me that file, darling,' are you saying that you want me to pass you this file or," and Arthur had never been so plagued by the word 'or' before, "are you asking, darling, for something else?"

Yusuf took a disgustingly loud mouthful of his sandwich and, chewing, said, "I'd bet fifty bucks on the latter."

"Shut up," Arthur hissed.

"Now, now," said Eames, leaning on the desk beside Arthur's arm, "let's not take our frustration out on poor Yusuf."

"I think he wants to take his frustration out on--" Yusuf began but broke off into a wide, food-filled grin as he swallowed. "You know."

"Shut up," Arthur hissed again, louder.

"Focus on me, please," said Eames, directing Arthur's face by a finger on his chin. "Let's say, for the edification of all and sundry, who in this room is your darling?"

"I didn't mean--"

"Just for clarity."

Arthur swallowed as Eames tapped the finger against his chin. He really didn't know whether he was furious enough to shoot Eames in the face yet or--the goddamned "or" again--whether this might just be the moment to do something else.

"I was talking to you," he said, finally.

"I thought as much," Eames said. He spun Arthur's chair so that they were facing each other dead-on.

"And when you say 'pass the file, darling,'" Eames insisted, his arms bracketing Arthur, leaning heavily on the arms of Arthur's chair, "did you mean 'pass the file' or, you know, 'pass the file.'"

"There's no double entendre in a file, Eames," said Arthur.

"I definitely heard a double entendre," Yusuf said.

"Shut up," Arthur and Eames said simultaneously.

"You can be honest, pet," said Eames, leaning even closer to Arthur.

"I meant--" he started to say but, really, what the ever loving fuck was the point of all this linguistic back-and-forthing when, yes, the answer was definitely the double entendre because how could a single entendre exist in a world where pants sat like that on Eames, and so, yes, he meant--and would always mean--pass the file.

Arthur closed the last hairline of space between their mouths. And with a mouth like Eames's involved, it was the kind of kiss that poets spend their entire careers trying to recapture with words. It was the kind of kiss that sends everyone to their totems, flipping poker chips and tossing dice--generally making sure that reality was also capable of extraordinary things.

"That's what I said you meant," Yusuf said.

The file hit him squarely across the face, the sheets of paper scattering around his feet.

[identity profile] errata_sonata.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
Aww, I like seeing Yusuf in a fic, the guy needs so more appreciation. Adorable prompt, adorable fic. Eames is evil, but your Arthur seems like the type who would have kept his feelings bottled up forever had he not made a slip up. Lovely.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:50 am (UTC)(link)
The guy sure needs some love. Yusuf FTW!

[identity profile] grimgrimm.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
BRB WHEN I HAVE ACCESS TO A DAMN COMPUTER AND NOT JUST A MOBILE. I WILL TELL YOU MY FAVORITE PART. BECAUSE THERE ARE MANY.

[identity profile] grimgrimm.livejournal.com 2010-08-07 09:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Absolute favorite:

"Language is delicate and unspecific, my pet," said Eames, chiding. "One must take caution in expressing oneself and in the interpretation of others."

"One must also hand over the goddamned file."

Second:

"And when you say 'pass the file, darling,'" Eames insisted, his arms bracketing Arthur, leaning heavily on the arms of Arthur's chair, "did you mean 'pass the file' or, you know, 'pass the file.'"

"There's no double entendre in a file, Eames," said Arthur.

"I definitely heard a double entendre," Yusuf said.

"Shut up," Arthur and Eames said simultaneously.

GDAMN I love this fic so much

(no subject)

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com - 2010-08-09 01:50 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] cathybites.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
HEEE! oh man, I just totally did a brain-damaged seal clap over this because it is so EXCELLENT.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:50 am (UTC)(link)
*nods* We've all been there.

[identity profile] stentoriansista.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
Afreakingdorable. Love it.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks!

[identity profile] cheesy-fairy.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:45 am (UTC)(link)
awwwww i adore you n your fic >,<
i like when Eames teasing Arthur to the max :DDD
lovely n luvvvvvvv it ^^

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
Glad you liked it!

[identity profile] a-singlenote.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 04:51 am (UTC)(link)
Love it xD very funny, poor Arthur for his little slip!! :P

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
Poor Arthur ooooorrrr is his subconscious pulling a Freudian slip on him? XD

[identity profile] shoppermania.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 06:45 am (UTC)(link)
Awww yay!
And lol Yusuf ftw!

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
LOL I just wrote Yusuf FTW, like, two seconds ago. Trufact!

[identity profile] dowdsyndrome.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
OMG YUSUF I LOVE YOU BAHAHAHAHA
this is so adorable!

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
We need to start a chant, like at a futball game...yuSUF! yuSUF!

[identity profile] lemniciate.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 07:51 am (UTC)(link)
Haha! This made me smile a lot. Thank you! ♥

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
No, thank YOU. XD

[identity profile] ilovetakahana.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 09:33 am (UTC)(link)
BRB LOLing and squeeing forever.

Love the idea of Yusuf being the peanut gallery and thinking that all sorts of payback are just so worth it. ♥

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
Yusuf is accidentally the main character here, foh sure.

[identity profile] johanirae.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 12:47 pm (UTC)(link)
"Language is delicate and unspecific, my pet," said Eames, chiding. "One must take caution in expressing oneself and in the interpretation of others."

"One must also hand over the goddamned file."


HAHAHAHAHA I so love the banter in this! Poor Arthur! XD

You totally made my evening SO much better hon thanx!!!
Edited 2010-08-06 12:48 (UTC)

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
Awwww, glad to be of service.

[identity profile] byandby.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 01:04 pm (UTC)(link)
This was fantastic. I love the back and forth between them!

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks!

[identity profile] behindthec.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 02:25 pm (UTC)(link)
THIS IS MY FAVORITE FOREVER.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
AWESOME. XD

[identity profile] liketheroad.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 03:15 pm (UTC)(link)
THIS WAS DELIGHTFUL.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
THANK YOU.
osaraba: (tom hardy condescension)

[personal profile] osaraba 2010-08-06 03:45 pm (UTC)(link)
YOU WIN EVERYTHING FOREVER! \o/ Everyone was amazing and OMG THE NERVE OF YUSUF! You've created a new cheerleader for him! AND EAMES! He was just so sharp! This line absolutely KILLED me:

"Focus on me, please," said Eames, directing Arthur's face by a finger on his chin.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
Bwahaha! I win EVERYTHING!

[identity profile] vulpesvortex.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 08:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Relatively new to the fandom, but I have to say that this may be my favourite fic yet. Poor Arthur, but I love Eames when he's being a dick.
Edited 2010-08-06 20:43 (UTC)

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
I bet Arthur loves when Eames is a dick too...XD

[identity profile] gabsy.livejournal.com 2010-08-06 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG love it! Yusuf deserves more fictime, for sure!

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
We should form a Yusuf-supporting posse. And we could be play it cool, like the Jets and the Sharks.

[identity profile] aaahha.livejournal.com 2010-08-07 12:47 am (UTC)(link)
I love this. I love Eames in this or you know, in everything

So adorable and made me giggle.

"Language is delicate and unspecific, my pet," said Eames, chiding. "One must take caution in expressing oneself and in the interpretation of others."

"One must also hand over the goddamned file."
lol. If Eames' teasing hadn't been enough to get me grinning like an idiot, Arthur's reply would have.

Oh, and I totally loved Yusuf in this! :)

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
Why is it always so hilarious when people start with the "one must--" business? Cuz I find it hilarious, always.

(no subject)

[identity profile] aaahha.livejournal.com - 2010-08-09 02:23 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] soliandxpyne.livejournal.com 2010-08-07 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
Wahaha, I loved this. Eames and Arthur bitching bantering at each is when they are best, definitely. XDD

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
Ummm...your icon may have just exploded me. It is too cool for school, surely.

[identity profile] honeymull.livejournal.com 2010-08-07 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
I just literally flapped my hands around and then covered my mouth with them to hold in all my delighted squeaky noises, right here at the computer desk. THIS IS SO FANTASTIC AND LOLDORABLE I COULD DIE.

(And omg, Yusef. BEST. BEST OF THE BEST.)

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
Is it sad that what I gleaned from your comment was: "Yes! Scored a loldorable!" ??

(no subject)

[identity profile] honeymull.livejournal.com - 2010-08-09 02:08 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] amuly.livejournal.com 2010-08-07 06:00 am (UTC)(link)
Eeeeehehehe. Loved this. *Pass the file* *snork* Sooooooo scandalous ~.^

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
It's the most scandalous a file has ever been. XD

[identity profile] roulettedarling.livejournal.com 2010-08-08 02:55 pm (UTC)(link)
"Yusuf doesn't even have a file, you ass," said Arthur.

Haha, I love you. This is hilarious.

[identity profile] ifeelbetter.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
Glad you liked it!

[identity profile] dementedsiren.livejournal.com 2010-08-10 05:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, Yusuf.
And Eames, all seductive and linguistic and such. Lovely :)

[identity profile] venilia.livejournal.com 2010-08-14 05:38 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, sweet, adorable, and hot. Nice combo!

[identity profile] captanddeastar.livejournal.com 2010-08-15 05:28 pm (UTC)(link)
This is ADORABLE times a million.

<3YUSUF<3

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